**** **** **** **** **** Happy New Year! **** **** **** **** ****
I've been M.I.A. lately, and I apologize if I didn't respond to any one of your posts. I'm back here on the Island now, back to school tomorrow and to the real world (argghh).
To those of you ladies who aren't on my f-list, here's a link to my holiday post, including pics. I promised I would share!
Hope to see you post soon, -Kerissa.
Ok, tell me this...I know I'm still young...But did anyone else find it a little bit daunting to turn nineteen??Today is my day to do just that.It's like...Hello, real world.Oh well, it'll be fun!!!!
1. Your name/age: Maddy/18 (19 on the 21st, though!)2. Location: Northampton, Massachusetts3. Your heritage/ spoken languages: American and British citizen (dual citizenships), and I really don't know about my heritage. Some mix of European countries. I prefer dead languages to spoken ones, so while I can't speak anything other than English, I can translate Greek and Latin. 4. Why you'd like to join us: I'm really going on a kick right now, trying to really love myself and my body, and I thought this community could really help.5. What are three great things about your personality: I'm wicked friendly once you get to know me, I think that I can have awesome conversations, and I am really caring towards my friends.6. What are three things you love about your body (or hope to love soon): I love the shape of my body, my curves, I just think it's a lumpy. Haha. I like my breasts, too.7. Are there any body love websites/ movies/ books you can recommend to us?: Cunt: A Declaration of Independence by Inga Muscio is amazing.8. Who is a strong, beautiful female you admire?: I think that Amanda Palmer from the Dresden Dolls is lovely. I think she's gorgeous, and strong and so confident in herself.( PicturesCollapse )
New glasses! Yay! ( Read more...Collapse )
so i told james (the guy i like) what has been going on with me lately and that im pregnant. how it all came about and everything. i honestly was prepared for a "go to hell, bitch" response..... i have a lack of faith in people in general anymore and i assume the worst...but instead of that, he was sweet and caring. he lives in california..and since july we've been trying to come up with a time for me to spend a weekend down there. our scheduals clash majorly and with us both working, him volunteering out the ass and me helping with my nephews and niece...it's been hard. we finally settled on the end of january...and i mentioned how i still wanted to go see him.his concern was for my health. i spent a while trying to convience him im not dying and that it is safe for me to go away for a weekend. that i would still be able to do all the fun sightseeing stuff and that most things havent changed in my life. im tired more, i eat more and i gained a bit of weight..but other than that im still suzy. hopefully i did a good job.i feel really good about everything so far...i hope i can keep it up. anyway..happy new years ya'll.
Well i got bored yesterday and started going camera crazy and here are some products of that. ( My Pretty Pictures Not ReallyCollapse )
Hey Ladies! A lot of thoughts have been crossing my mind in terms of derogatory phrases and how they are being taken back by the people they were meant to hurt. For example, the *N* word has been flipped and reversed by African American people, and almost made into a term of endearment, same for the *F* word by homosexual people(I will not say them because I don't want to upset anyone who doesn't agree, but I'm sure you all know what words I'm talking about) In this particular case, the word for me has been "fat." You know it and have heard it many times, and I can pretty much guarantee that when you have heard it, it has been negatively used. "She's so fat, her thighs catch fire when she walks!" "If I were that fat, I would kill myself!" "God you have such a pretty face, why do you have to hide behind all that fat?" VERY rarely have we heard the word "fat" in a positive manner, unless you're talking about steak or money in your pockets or something like that. But something interesting happened to me a few days ago, and I wanted to share it with all of you.I do a lot of my deep thinking in the shower in the morning. As I was doing this, I was humming a tune to myself that I eventually realized was a tune that used to torment me when I was a kid. The neighborhood kids would sing "Fat Girl" to the tune of the 70s "Batman" TV show to tease me mercilessly and send me crying into my house. Now, at 24, I found myself singing it and finding it rather *catchy* in a way. In that moment, a simple label, meant to hurt and demean me, was suddenly taken back by me, thinking of it in a positive way. I am a fat girl. No matter how much weight I lose, my body will always be fat. I have a round ass that shakes when I walk, boobs I could feed an army with, thighs with cellulite, and a gut that forces its way out of tight jeans when I eat. And speaking of eating, I love to eat good food. A fat girl eating isn't a crime. We enjoy food just like our skinny counterparts. I love enjoying a great meal, whether it's by myself or in good company. Are you looking at me and saying "God you're too fat to be eating that!" Well, turn away honey, cause I'm enjoying it! I am determined to take the word "fat" back and make it positive. "Does my ass look fat in these jeans? Perfect!" We can't let this word make us cry and send us into our houses anymore. We need to embrace the figures that we were given, and treat them as the temples that they are. I felt all of this in that second I realized what I was singing. It's taking some time, but I am slowly able to refer to myself as a "fat" girl and not feel like I'm putting myself down. This doesn't mean I want someone to scream "Fatass" at me in the street, just as a Black person or a homosexual person wouldn't want those "special" words screamed at them. But if they do, I feel like I'm gaining the strength where I can whip my head around, bat my eyes and flash a killer smile; in a way, giving them a big middle finger and silently yelling, "You can't hurt me with that word anymore!" So the question I pose to all of you is, have you managed to take back the word "fat," and how? Kisses, everyone!
sometimes the hardest choices in life, are the ones we have to make when we look inward. admitting it to people is even harder.recently i have had to deal with a bunch of stuff....making decision that will effect the lives of many people. im not good with decision making in general and when it comes to others, i tend to worry constantly if im doing the right thing. life is hard, but you only get one chance at it and i dont want to screw up too much.this summer....something happened to me that will change the course of my life forever. someone (a guy) who i thought was a friend (as in just a friend) took advantage of me (that sounds better doesnt it) and i found out i am pregnant. at first the choice on what to do, seemed so easy. just to get rid of the baby. make it easier on everyone else involved, myself and also the baby. but i love kids. they mean so much to me. my nephews and my niece are my world. the more i thought about this and the longer i "put it off" i realized i wasnt putting it off because of financial reasons, but because it was something i couldnt bring myself to do.does that mean i am ready to be a single mother? oh god no. there are days i can barely take care of myself and that doesnt even count the financial obligations of taking care of a child. the guy who took advantage of me, seems to have had a "double" life that i didnt realize about....he is in jail now for 5 years on grand theft...my sister had her kids young...raised them .. got food stamps all that and i swore to myself i would never get welfare...never. i wont do it now. i have decided to go the adoption route. it's not the easiest thing to realize, but the kind of life i want this child to have, is one i can not afford to give it.im busy helping raise my nephews and my niece...their lives have already been compromised to the fullest extent of the word. it's getting better, but who nows what is to happen with them? i dont want to bring another child into the mess...another child with out the chances they deserve.i am due at the begining of may..this is suppose to be the happiest time in a girls life, right? but it's scary and i dont like it. i have a guy in my life...one i like a lot and have for a while now. i havent told him yet and i need to. im afraid that once i do, he'll go. i'm good at picking assholes and for once in many years, i dont think james is one of the "assholes". i guess only time will tell ... right?anyway, thank you.
To everyone, I hope you have a wonderful Holiday Season!
You ladies are all amazing, and you deserve all the happiness in the world. Mwah!!
Make sure to take pictures to share with us later! I promise to do the same.
( Picture with SantaCollapse )
merry xmas everyone =)
So my b/f and i went out to dinner tonight, it was nice, but i needed a dress so i made this before we went out. oh AND my cat is sooo cute!( Read more...Collapse )
I've been telling Karissa that I would post my intro for a while now, and I keep forgetting to do it, so here goes, finally.
Your name/age: 24 / Virginia, my friends just call me V.
Location: Fort Hood, Texas. until the Army moves us again.
Your heritage/ spoken languages: German/English/Irish/Scottish... MUTT. and I speak English, thanks.
Why you'd like to join us: Been here since the start, just never said hi!
What are three great things about your personality: I'm open, honest and damned funny!
What are three things you love about your body (or hope to love soon): My smile, my eyes and my ASS!
Are there any body love websites/ movies/ books you can recommend to us? I would say NUF, but I think I'd be stoned to death. SOOOO I will tell you my favorite community on LJ. BEWITCHINGBBWS. Check them out, I love it there.
Who is a strong, beautiful female you admire? My mother. Strong like you wouldn't believe. Someday I hope to be as good of a woman as she is.
So I guess pics now? I'll stick them behind an LJ cut for y'all! Dial up beware, I'm a picture whore!
( peektures! oldest to newest!Collapse )
I recently got a deviantART and came across this person. Her pictures rock!!http://missshyly.deviantart.com/
I found this today...Fat is not a four letter word. It is not obscene, or inappropriate for minors to hear, or dirty, or uncouth. What it describes is not something only done or talked about in hushed whispers and dark corners. It tells you nothing of my moral fiber, the content of my character, my cute quirks and annoying tendencies. It doesn't tell you anything about my exercise or eating habits, or whether I revel in my body or am ashamed of it. It does not give you insight into my fears and longings, my hopes and dreams. It is not a word that, when uttered, has the power to make me feel small or less than you. I am not. I am large, powerful. I am bigger than life, round with abundance and the fruits of the earth. I relish in my senses – all of them – and find delights of sensation where others find only denial. I live with dignity and self-love, and I reclaim this word, so small, but so densely packed with hatred and fear and loathing and condemnation. I embrace it as fully mine, as part of me, as a harmless adjective that tells you nothing, really, about who I am - except that I am fat.Copyright 2005 Sita Mae Edwards
Hmm so Kerissa reminded me that I have yet to post any photos. Needless to say, I was shocked at myself (but not really because I'm so stinkin' busy) and I figured I'd remedy the situation immediately. So, here you go.( Might I grace you with my presents...er...presence?Collapse )
i'm going in on the 15th to have my surgery.
One pretty photo. Hehe. Kelsey, Zoe and Me.We got all dressed up. :DI like dressing up. Dressing up is fun. I think i'm gonna head to ebay and get some funky hats and stuff, and dress up :D
Here's my monthly post, complete with cheesey tips on body love (sorry, I try to find things that aren't too lame)
First, a personal update: I've been doing really good, and I'm so excited for Christmas. I'll always be like a little kid when it comes to Snow and Christmas trees and Holiday Feasts! I just found out that I'm going to make it home for the Holidays. I was scared I wouldn't find the money to travel, but my mom is scrounging up some money to help me out. Soon I'll be back up-north in the snow, with my family. I'm so stoked.
Body and self wise, I've been feeling a little down. Being fat is hard. The random comments from strangers can be ignored (with some effort), but no one can quiet the voice in my head that talks shit everytime I look in the mirror. I'm working hard at being kinder to myself, and this community and you friends are really helpful. I just concentrate on all the things I have to be thankful for... and how even though my jeans are a size 24 (gasp!), they fit ME perfectly.
It's been a little quiet and lonely in here, but I'm hoping you guys will post more once you start getting all excited about the holidays. I hope to see updates and pics from you Ladies soon! -xoxoxo Kerissa.
My new hair color=niftyness. I love it, I don't think it exactly fits me, but it's still a very pretty color.( lime lightCollapse )~Riverx-posted
i just wanted to let you guys know that with the holiday and my grandpa's surgery last week i havent found time to contact the doctor yet about my stuff. my grandpa isnt doing real well right now and he's still in the hospital. im taking off work today and headed up there as we speak. hope all had a good thanksgiving....
Does anyone have a problem with stretch jeans and having the "saggy booty" syndrome after wearing them for awhile? If I go a size lower my ass looks good but then my belly hangs over(which to me looks tacky)but when they fit my waist comfortably the sag in the ass.What do i do?? any suggestions? any good name brands or anything you guys could help me with would be more than appreciated..thanks! :)
greetings on and greetings all ... I have a question about Lane Bryant. I want this: http://lanebryant.charmingshoppes.com/Shopping/product.aspx?product_id=LPFR0019&nav=LPmy query is ... quality? fit? any comments etc??everything greatfully heard :)
So I went on holiday for a week and we took some pictures! ( Yay!Collapse )
so i found out the dr i need to go to for my surgery operates on a sliding fee scale. im going to call him monday and go in there and see if i cant get a reduction on what the bill will be. it wouldnt be so bad, but everything is up front and i dont have insurance. after the bills are paid (rent..etc) i have a little over $200/mo..which isnt much. im scared that i'll get a big fat "NO we cant help you" and i'll have to wait longer. im tired of feeling sick all the time and being tired. i hope this works. please cross your fingers and say a prayer for me. i think i need it. im too stressed out...thanks guys
Yesterday was the most fun day ever. I got to spend the whole day shopping with my sister and her baby, and the baby was sooo cute! I bought way to much stuff and ended up spending more than I actually had in my bank account. I bought my husband a sweet evil dead shirt and office space on dvd. While we were shopping she started crying so I picked her up and held her and she fell asleep, it was the cutest thing ever.( here's a picture at the begining of our dayCollapse )
In case any of you wanted to see that episode of the Tyra Banks show where she wears the "fat suit", its on at midnight tonight on Oxygen. Anyways its supposed to be on tonight. I'm tivoing it.
Ok, so I am not an artist....but I do write. And I just came across a poem near and dear to me. I know it is a bit off, but it is something that makes me happy.It is also one thing I am thankful for. That I was given this ability!I can see your smileI can hear your laughterI can hear your sweet voiceFeel your lipsTouch your skinFeel your breathI long to see you once againFeel your arms around meYour lips on mineYour breath on my skinSoft whispersDreamingLost in YouLonging for youWanting youYou!I see your smileHear your laughterYour sweet voiceI feel your lipsYour skinBreathYOU!
I felt good today so I decided to wear this white skirt i've had for about a year but never worn cause I felt self concious in it. Its one of those long white flowing skirt things.So i come out of my room this morning in that and a pretty emerald green top (Which looked awesome with my hair and boobs by the way.) and my mother says "You know that white makes you look fatter dont you?"Why is it that the person most critical of me is the one who is meant to love me unconditionally?!Anyway, i stormed off into my room and changed. Came out in the same white skirt, but i changed into a white top. Spent the whole day in all white.Fat pride biatch.
i didnt add pictures or anything the other day, so here's one. it's not the best or anything recent..but ( hereCollapse )
My name is Rose and I am new to the community so let me tell you a little about myself: ( Read more...Collapse )I am excited to be a new member of this community and feel free to add me if you like. Thanks for being beautiful people!
i figured that i would go back and do a "real" introduction to myself. the one yesterday was sort of weak. sorry, i was busy...but wanted to get it done.My name is Suzy and im 26 years old. I live in lovely Boise, Idaho. My life is pretty normal for the most part...i have a really close relationship with my family and am currently helping my mom and stepfather raise my two nephews and niece (10, 8 and 4). They are my entire world and bring me so much happiness! i love them. When i am not busy helping with the kids, im most likely at work (telemarketing) or hanging out at home. I have always had weight problems...up and down most of my "adult" life. A few years ago, I lived in Seattle for a year. I moved there a size 8-10 and I moved home a size 16. It took me four years to drop the weight, but last summer i FINALLY did it. I was back to a size 10 and i was so happy. Recently I have had a lot of health related issues and my weight is now back up there...I am having surgery at the end of the month...after that hopefully i will begin to feel better once again and my weight will improve. Over all i need to learn to love myself reguardless of how i look and how much i weigh...hopefully with the support of you all that will begin. It's about time
Your name/age: Suzy / 26Location: IdahoYour heritage/ spoken languages: British Why you'd like to join us: for most of my life i have struggled with liking myself physically, that is something most of my friends cant relate with. It would be nice to have a place and people to turn to on days where im less sure of myself than others. What are three great things about your personality: friendly, outgoing, wacky!What are three things you love about your body (or hope to love soon): right now, i cant think of anything. maybe with time that will change..Are there any body love websites/ movies/ books you can recommend to us? personally i dont know of any, but i would love all suggestions!Who is a strong, beautiful female you admire? i admire many strong, beautiful females. the first one that comes to mind is my own mother. she is the epitome of greatness. thanks guys =)
It's a community requirement that all posts be kept safe from the general public.
Thank you to those who have posted only to "friends";)
Hello all, and welcome to the community! I know, I know -- I haven't posted anything yet, but I've been swamped with work and school and have finally taken time out of both to sit down and hopefully write something of value. But for starters, I will now post my info -- so everyone can know a bit about me and who I am (who's this crazy redhead mod anyway?) Well, here it is!• Your name/age: Bambi Aletha Blue• Location: Ottawa, Ontario CANADA (specifically, the little Italy district)• Your heritage/ spoken languages: I’m Canadian (several generations) although I speak French and English, Japanese, Polish, and Finnish fluently• Why you'd like to join us: Dudes, I’m a mod :P I live for communities like this. Self love, baby. I have lots of love for others too!• What are three great things about your personality: I’m patient – everyone needs their time to be who they are, and I give them that space. I’m well rounded – a smart cookie who’s had lots of life experience for her years and can and does relate to people as best as she can…whoa, talking in third person makes me feel weeeeird.• What are three things you love about your body (or hope to love soon): My BOOBS. Hehe – they’re pretty. My eyes, it sells the rest of the package every time :P And my hair – never a dull moment with my hair…• Are there any body love websites/ movies/ books you can recommend to us? Zen and The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance (it’s a book) – it’s all about self-love and finding yourself. The pursuit of knowledge – the hardest knowledge to gain…who you are!• Who is a strong, beautiful female you admire? My mommy :) She’s been through hell and back raising my family and she’s still the most beautiful woman – her power shows in her smile. Tough as nails but speaks so softly and her eyes twinkle with kindness. ( familyCollapse ) Soon there will be poetry from me -- and art work, and crazy rantings! Beware! :)
Your name/age: Kielly, 22Location: Baton Rouge, LouisianaYour heritage/ spoken languages: I am black or African American, which ever you prefer. I also have a little French mixed in from the Creole side. I only speak English but have been attempting to learn Spanish.Why you'd like to join us: I would like to join because I want to be apart of a positive community that actually wants to build people up and not tear them down.What are three great things about your personality: funny, smart and independentWhat are three things you love about your body (or hope to love soon): eyes, legs, and breastAre there any body love websites/ movies/ books you can recommend to us? "Muriel's Wedding" starring Toni Collette is amazing! I can not think of any thing else right now.Who is a strong, beautiful female you admire? I admire Oprah Winfrey because she came from a poor background to become the first self made woman billionaire. She also actually wants to help people in the world. I thing that is pretty amazing.